The Temp Who Thought He Was Permanent

Once there was a temporary worker who thought he was permanent. He was given a short-term assignment of only two weeks, in a big, name-brand, national corporation. He arrived the first day bright and early. His suit; fresh from the cleaners, his hair; neatly combed and styled. He greeted everyone with a polite smile and a firm handshake while his new supervisor introduced him to the office.

For his two-weeks he was very professional, handling all his tasks diligently and with calm demeanor. He coordinated with his fellow employees and met all his deadlines. He took his temporary job very seriously and was actually glad to be here.

At the end of his two week assignment, his boss called him in and offered to extend the assignment for another month.

“I must be doing a good job,” thought the temp. He was proud, felt good, and gladly accepted the extension. As the weeks went by, he continued working diligently, always being pleasant with the other employees, and really enjoyed working here. His supervisor, and soon all the other supervisors, saw he was very capable and started handing him more assignments. The assignments also became more difficult and involved. But the temp welcomed new challenges and took pride in proving he could take-on more.

He started working quicker and harder. His days became faster paced. The supervisors became very impressed with the temp’s performance and soon allowed all the non-management employees to hand him their extra workloads. The temp became very busy, but he did his best and did not mind this. He felt part of the company, just like a regular employee.

At the end of the month his supervisor called him in again and said management was so impressed with him they decided to once again extend his contract but this time for six months.

“Hmmm,” thought the temp. This sounded like good news but something didn’t feel right about it. “Is there a chance of me being made permanent?” he asked. His supervisor told him that “management” was considering this, but it was too soon to tell. The temp saw this as an opportunity and became optimistic. He gladly agreed to the six-month extension as the future may hold some promise. He continued to work hard the next six months. The employees liked him. He was invited to go on breaks with them, and he almost always had someone to have lunch with.

The six months flew by fast. The temp had celebrated two holidays with the office, and several birthday lunches. Finally, he sat with his supervisor and asked about the permanent position. His supervisor, an honest fellow, reluctantly told him his position would not become permanent. However, he was free to stay here on a week-to-week contract since they could still use him.

The temp’s jaw dropped and his eyes grew wide-open. Time seemed to stand still as so many thoughts raced through his head. How could he stay motivated now? He wanted to put his foot down and leave but he had no other job lined-up. He could quit and find another job, a real one. But how long would that take? He thought of his bills, his rent, his car payments. He soon arrived at a decision, and told his boss he’d stay, but would look for other positions in this huge company. His supervisor also recommended he do this. It sounded like a good plan, and the temp was once again motivated to work hard and with a smile.

Over the next few months, which flew by like days, he applied for several positions within the company. He was selective in what he applied for, since he did not know what every position entailed.

After every application, the temp would hear nothing for the longest time. Then he began receiving letters in the mail. Excitedly, he would open them only to find the shortest, coldest message stating that he did not have enough “years” of experience in specific areas of each position. A cold, dark feeling hit his gut as he knew he had to change his strategy. But things were different now. He still worked hard in his fast-paced days but his longtime smile was not there.

The months flew by like weeks and soon the temp found himself there one year. “How time flies!” he thought. He took a minute from his workload and reflected upon the fact another year had passed and he hadn’t taken a vacation. He couldn’t afford to. He didn’t have vacation days like the regular employees did. He hadn’t taken a day off. He couldn’t afford to take a day without pay. His bills would not forgive him. And he never took a sick day off. Heaven forbid if he ever got sick. He was snapped out of his thoughts by a call from his supervisor, and he got right back to work.

Only a week went by of much thinking and he came up with a great idea. He would meet with the Director of Human Resources and explain his situation. Maybe she could help him out. She had the power, and human resources was seen as sympathetic and supportive of the employees.

After a little research, he found out who the Director of Human Resources was. He planned his next day carefully, and then that day, made his move. He opened the elegant wooden door to HR and confidently approached the receptionist. Once there, he asked to meet with the HR Director. With a stroke of luck, she was available to meet with him right away. And so it started….

“I’ve been a temp here for a year now. I do like the company and would like a permanent position….” He went on about his department dragging their feet about making his position permanent. About their promises they wouldn’t keep. That he was educated and had extensive work experience in many areas. And that he had applied to several positions within the company but either received no response, or got the usual “thank you but no thank you letter” because of his lack of years of specific experience, or who knows what.

The Director of Human Resources sputtered out in a sterile corporate smile, “I’m sorry, our policy prohibits us from accepting unsolicited resumes.” The temp was taken aback. The lady looked like a human, but how could she not even hear him and utter out a pre-recorded message? So he tried again.

“No, no. I’ve been a temp here in this company for a year…” And again in unchanged expression came out, “I’m sorry, our policy prohibits us from.…”

“Unsolicited resumes!?,” he thought. He wasn’t unsolicited! Now he became angry. Angry on the inside but smart enough to stay calm and collected on the outside. So with his best fake-professional smile, he thanked the HR Director for her answer and time, and walked away demoralized.

Back at his desk he stared into his computer monitor and became more frustrated. “What have I done?” he thought. “What did I do wrong? Didn’t I work my hardest? Didn’t I finish all my assignments on time? Wasn’t I always professional? Didn’t I spend every minute of my working day for this company? Should I have looked for another job on company time? That never would have occurred to me. Why didn’t it? I never dreamed this would….”

And with that last thought he dropped his face into his hands and grimaced in defeat. He got up and handed his security badge to his supervisor, leaving him dumbfounded. The temp walked away down the quiet hallway, never wanting another temp job again.

A Single Man’s View on Dating “Don’ts” for Women

I’d like to write to young women about dating from a single man’s perspective. As I began outlining tips for this article, I remembered many times and experiences from my own recent dating. My points then became more of a “don’t do” list, but I feel compelled to share them with girls so they know what just doesn’t work with a man. And you’ll be more certain that he’ll call you again.

If some of the points I’ll discuss seem obvious to you, congratulations, you’re a better dater than most other girls. But these things did happen to me so it tells me that a lot of girls out there have more to learn.

Girls, when on a date, don’t constantly be on your cell phone. That is such a rude distraction and is immature. Don’t keep calling your girlfriends to tell them you’re on a date with whomever. And don’t keep getting the phone when it rings. I’ve had dates answer their phone over dinner, in the middle of a meaningful conversation, and twice at the movies. Turn your phone off, or if you’re expecting an important call, look at the number before you pick up. One girl had to answer her phone four times as I was trying to share a margarita with her. I finally gave up and tried to leave; however, she grabbed my arm and wouldn’t let me go.

Give the man your undivided attention. This will make him feel good about you and himself. At a restaurant, don’t start making chatty conversation or flirt with the waiters or guests at other tables. Waiters do a great job, but I’m not there for my date to become their best friend. If you absolutely have to talk to everyone you see, go out by yourself, not with a date.

Never ask a man if he kisses on the first date. That will put pressure on him and make him feel obligated. Let things happen naturally. He may want to kiss you. I once went on a date with this girl who asked me. Since I was taken aback I answered “no,” even though I would have kissed her. Needless to say, the ride home was awkward and the mood was spoiled.

This next point I’ve seen written in so many dating articles and magazines but girls just don’t listen. After a few dates, even if you really like him, don’t ask him to commit to you. Don’t pressure him or he will run. I made the mistake of kissing (for a long time) a girl on a second date and she then told me I had to call her every week, and that the following weekend we had to see a movie, and that I couldn’t just ask her out once a month. I eventually got angry with her demands and broke-off from her. Let the man be the pursuer. He needs to decide if he wants to call or see you again. I know this is rough for many girls in their thirties, but it’s the game that has to be played.

Ladies, and I use the that term loosely, if you hurry him into romance, be prepared to face the reality that he still might not call you for a while. He’s doing a lot of thinking, and it’s you who rushed him into the romance. Quick romance does not consummate the relationship as he is still free to decide the pace of seeing you. Also, he may think you are easy and seek romance from you with no intention of committing. Be careful here.

Hopefully you’re not one of these girls who are extremely choosy about restaurants or what you eat. One thing that turns a man off is a picky, high-maintenance woman. Unless you can’t stand the place he chooses, it should be fine. If you really hate the place, suggest another, but don’t do this a second time. I had a date once who decided against the first two places we arrived at. She just didn’t like the atmosphere (which was lively) or the menu, or who knows what. Thank goodness the third place was acceptable to her, (even though I had to negotiate with the manager about eating there because some special event was being held).

While on the date, ask him questions about himself. Get to know him. Who knows, you might like him. Don’t go on and on about yourself while he politely nods or says, “mmmhhmm..,” or keeps himself entertained by eating. And girls, this I find very odd, don’t go on forever about how much you love your dog or cat. Don’t pull out pet portraits from your purse as you sip wine. This happened to me at my favorite seafood restaurant, and I figured I couldn’t compete with my date’s pet.

And whatever you do, don’t bring up other men you know on your date. He will read this as lots of competition. Depending on what type of guy he is, he may decide not to jump into the ring to compete, and you’ve just fouled out. He may also think you just want to add him to your list of boyfriends.

Once you’ve gone out with him a few times, continue to be ready when he picks you up. Don’t take him for granted by making him wait outside your door, or in his car for fifteen-plus minutes. I’ve had to stand and wait in the rain which made me wonder why I was even seeing the girl.

If your date is a gentleman, don’t use profanity or sexual terms. He will immediately think you are cheap or not up to his standards, and you’ve fouled out again. I’ve turned a few girls down because of their potty-mouths. I had one lunch spoiled so I didn’t ask her out again.

Another point: I went out with this girl I kind-of liked but she’d call her girlfriends and invite them to drop in on us. If that wasn’t enough, the girls would chatter away with girl-talk which made me wonder if I should leave them alone. The date is supposed to be a special time to get to know each other, not show him off to your girlfriends. And worry about this; what if he takes a fancy to one of them?

Finally, you don’t have to give him a kiss at the end of the date if you don’t want to. Just smile and thank him for a nice time, and if he moves in, just give him your cheek. That’s still a sweet, cordial way to say thank you.

Don’t rummage for your keys or fumble at the door as if you’re desperately trying to run inside, unless you really don’t want to see him again. Many girls will thank a man for the date and turn away to unlock the door so fast. What message are you giving him?

And there you have it; my list of “don’ts” which I’ve experienced with various girls. Hopefully I will meet a nice young lady that has read enough dating articles like this one and knows the man’s perspective. When I do meet her, I hope I won’t do any of her “don’ts.”